My abusive ex is now engaged, and we broke up a year ago. Why is he still stalking my social media? ?
I have blocked countless accounts and he continues to stalk me. The messages have stopped, but he continues viewing my “story”. He threatened to kill men that he noticed I was involved with after we broke up. I stayed very discreet since then. Should I still worry for the day that he sees me with someone else, even though he is now engaged? Is it flattering or threatening if my ex-boyfriend’s current gf has copied me often and stalked me in a nonviolent way?
I dated my ex for 4 years. I broke up with him. The breakup was easy for both of us, and we just stopped talking afterward and moved on, no issues.
A couple of years later he got a new girlfriend. He and I are both 35 and his new girlfriend was 21 when het met her.
She initially came into the boutique where I work several times talking loudly on her phone to my ex on speaker, so I'd hear and realize she was his girlfriend. She even went out of her way to tell another customer, "I'm shopping for a new outfit to have a date night with my boyfriend, his last girlfriend was frumpy, and he likes nice clothes”, So she intentionally tried to bait me for an argument. She even had the balls to sign up to be a part of our rewards system and used her name and my ex's name as a joint reward account.
I ignored her and told my co-workers that if she came in again, I'd prefer not to assist her, and they volunteered to help her instead.
A year goes by no issues and suddenly I notice she liked one of my Instagram photos from 8 years ago then unliked it. I then knew her social media username and noticed she copied a lot of things I do. She got the same exact dog as me, same breed, same color (rare breed) and named it a similar name. I'd post a photo of myself wearing a blue shirt with loose wavy hair and a specific makeup look, she copied my look, the shirt, makeup and hair almost a perfect match and posted a selfie. She also copies photography locations I go to and posts photos of the same location days after me. What would you do?
Dear Stalking victim,
This sounds very dangerous to me; she sounds just as unbalanced as him if not more so! I think you must take drastic action to protect yourself. First, create all new social media accounts under another name, perhaps your middle name or a name he won’t think of. His girlfriend is not flattering, she is threatening. And yes, you should worry about the day he sees you with someone else. I would go to the police station and tell an officer there everything, especially about the death threats. I would ask if I could get a restraining order on both of them, which would also include your place of work. Then if you get one and see them near your home or work, call the police immediately. Keep your phone with you at all times. Bullies go away if they are bullied, and by you being brave and standing up to this, they will look for an easier target. Also, the police should have a record of what has happened in case it escalates. They may talk to them or even charge them, because what they are doing is stalking, violent or not.
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